Oct 31
T9 Predictive Text: Bias, Censorship, or Just Jilly?
Well, here it is.
The Captain has discovered that T9 predictive text (the software that governs text messaging functions for almost all cellphones) has some major programming issues.
We’ve all had the experience of trying to type a text message and the phone doesn’t recognize a friend’s name. How could it? Why would it? (My cellphone does not know my friend Kenji, and I don’t blame it) Now, some of us have gone a step further and come to the realization that our cellphones don’t recognize slang words (wassup, homey, aiight, see ya, etc…). Even fewer of us know, that when it comes to cursing, our cellphones are just plain square. Which is odd, because the cellphone industry does everything it can to make us think our phones are the hippest things since retro tee-shirts (see Motorola Razr 2… A weapon?), yet for some reason the text messaging software remains downright Puritanical.
This got me thinking… Who decided exactly what words the T9 predictive text software would recognize, and which words it would remain ignorant of? Who decided what I can, and cannot text to my friends, family, and enemies? And while I know it is still possible to spell out the words letter by letter, it is a real pain in the ass. So, in effect, the cellphone industry, through the T9 software, has censored me (or at the very least made it nearly impossible for me to speak freely).
So I decided to I spend my morning testing the T9 system on my Verizon Samsung, and I am here to report some very interesting/frightening/ridiculous findings.
Here’s how my study worked. First I tried to type the desired word, then I cycled through the options, if it never arrived at my word I made a note of it. (In some cases, my phone wouldn’t even let me attempt to finish the word).
Study 1. Standard Name Calling
Notable findings:
1. The word “Chubi” really should be the new “Bitch” (my brother-in-law pointed this one out to me). This is how you would use it in a sentence, “Stop acting like such a Chubi and come drinking with me till we passout on some church steps, and embarrass our wives!”
2. “Whore” is not recognized but “hooker” and “prostitute” are. Is one better than the other? And what’s with the denial of Shakespearean synonyms?
3. Is “bastard” even a bad word? Some of my best friends are bastards. (Here’s where my puritanical complaints begin)
Study 2. Exclamations
Notable Findings:
1. I know religion is always a contentious issue, but am I not allowed to type “goddamn?” What would James Brown say?
2. The cellphone company knows that I am well over 18 so how come I can’t drop the occasional F-Bomb if the feeling strikes me?
Study 3. Bodily Functions
Notable Findings:
1. Since when is “crap” a bad word? (I think you can even say it on Nickelodeon)
2. They make “fart” just way too difficult to type. I need that word always at my finger tips.
3. How come I can text urinate and I can’t text defecate? (The only way to talk about #2 is by typing “poop”) (which ain’t so bad if you ask me).
Study 4. Body Parts (now here’s where it gets really interesting)
Notable Findings:
1. How come you can type “Vagina” and not “Penis?” These are both technical, medical terms, neither of which should be (or are) offensive to anyone. Maybe it’s just me, but there is something slightly sexist going on here. It feels a lot like how male nudity gets you a stronger film rating than female nudity.
(The, It’s-okay-to-see-a-little-Hoo-hah-as-long-as-you-don’t-see-any-Dong-dong principle)
2. If I was a feline, I would be insulted, outraged, and up in arms about the fact that if a friend wanted to call me a “pussy” they would only be able to call me a young dog. Cats of the world rise up and take to the streets!
So there it is… The definitive T9 predictive text, censorship study. What have we learned? Well, frankly, I’ve learned that I might have a bit too much time on my hands (don’t tell my employers). I have also learned that while some of this is kind of silly, (try texting “Man-gina” sometime and watch your phone freak-out) there are maybe just a few cultural issues here. I am not claiming that T9 or Nuance the company that just bought the software for $265 million has any real bias, but there are some things they might want to examine.
I, for one, am kind of sick of having corporations tell me what I can and cannot say. Now I know that you can add words to the phone’s dictionary, but that is a real pain in the assime (T9 - asshole). I say open up your dictionaries and let the public decide what they want to write. Make the under 18 dictionary a bit tamer, and then get rid of this Amish software you’ve forced on us! I ask you my wonderful blogging public to go forth and spread the word. Try these words out on your own phones. Then write and link back to me any inane, ridiculous, or just ducking (T9 F$@king) offensive glitches you find in their program. It’s time we tell those Chubies out there that we will not abide!Here are some other stories I found of people who have battled, and in one case won, the fight against predictive text.
Man’s phone prefers one sibling over the other
Digital Host’s Sanguine Penguin
Commuter Writes Book Using Cellphone
Viva la revulsion!
- Captain Cellfish
Runner-Up, 2nd Grade Spelling Bee
16 Comments so far
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Ill make the picket signs, you go on a hunger strike. Viva la Revulsion!!!!!
rock on Cap’n — i hear ya…well done!
When are we gonna go out drinkin, pass out on some church steps and embarass our wives… again
It is all true!! That is what is so amazing - to me at least. Spending at least 1/4 of my time at an airport has illuminated the Captain’s prose to me yet again. Many of my texted insults and emails to friends and bad clients have been Crackberry Bitch Slapped into illegible jargon……rewrite the rules and if you include a picture of the Viking like feline above, no one could ever resist.
It is extremely upsetting that this society has come to abandon the right of free speech through the censorship of the T9 empire. As a recent grad it is nearly impossible to attend college and portray one’s true feelings to either a friend or foe. I personally would like to thank you capt cellfish for bringing this horrid fact of modern life to light. next thing you know the cell phone providers will censor who they allow to speak on their network….
I couldn’t understand some parts of this article , but I guess I just need to check some more resources regarding this, because it sounds interesting.
Did we drunkenly discuss this at a bar recently? I spent a large portion of last night talking to jordan (and anyone else that would listen) about this exact issue. Jordan just sent me your blog link this morning. I’ve been using the word chubi non-stop for the last 24 hours (pronounced chew-bee). My other fave was homie (not spelled homey) which shows up as gonger. Anyway, well said my gonger (pronounced gone-jer). I’m a believer.
I have to say, that I could not agree with you in 100% regarding , but it’s just my opinion, which could be wrong
Ah yes senor bones! Thanks for the words of encouragement. My name is not seth, who ever gave you that idea? I am the captain. I had seth dismembered and sent to a watery grave! Peace out my gonger!
[…] messaging functions for almost all cellphones) and the findings will disturb fans of the profane. Apparently there is a whole lot of censorship going on. These icons link to social bookmarking sites where readers can share and discover new web […]
You can add words to the T9 dictionary by typing it in manually.
Yes it is true that you can add words, but in the time it takes to do that, you’ve already lost the desire to finish the message. That is the true definition of censorship. Making it a pain in the A@! to complete your task.
Thanks for the comment:)
I use the work nigga,pussy,ho,and cocksucker alot, i have an lg fusic that is awesome to text in. i had to add it once but now it know that i am spelling “pussy” instead of “puppy” so it has gotten better. i text alot so i didnt mind adding it but for some people that can barely get to the texting menu they have a big problem.
Nice!
We should be really concerned if they start censoring words from text messages at the servers. Imagine that you do go to all the trouble to type out a message to a not-so-chummy chum that’s telling them how it really is. But when the message gets delivered, it’s not the same as you typed — certain bad words got bleeped out. We’ll know the carriers have gone way too far when they start doing this. Thankfully we don’t seem to be there yet.
[…] he’d never amount to anything? So if you haven’t already please read my expose post on T9’s Text Message Censorship. It’s basically like Edward R Murrow, meets Rainbow […]